February 9th, 2005

女暗部 - bewilderment / distress

I wish I had stayed at home.

Not doing good. Everything is different today. I see hostility in the faces of passing strangers where I saw none before. I gag at the scent of tobacco smoke where I'd merely be mildly annoyed before.

The world is closing in on me, trying to crush me. The voices of the people in the cafeteria assault me as I make another run to get more tea. Need that water-boiler.

I should have stayed at home. Nothing good can happen today.

But home isn't a sanctuary. Jan is there. My mom's place isn't a sanctuary, it's where Odessa disappeared.

I don't have anywhere I can go and feel safe, a place I can let down my defenses. It's too much of a strain to maintain this wall between me and the rest of the world.

Updated Odessa's site with pictures. It's all in Norwegian, but I don't think anyone will have trouble navigating it. Will start working on a .css now. Or an icon. Whatever. Doesn't look like I'll have anything work-related to do today, thankfully.
Kuchiki Rukia - Not an Artist

worked on the icon.

Sheesh, that was a lot of work to animate the sparklies in GIMP. And looking at the end result, I chose a very wrong color for the text "Shiny!".. bah.

There must be a way to change it without re-doing from scratch. But I might do that anyway, because I just randomly did the stars. Would be prettier if the glow sort of moved from left to right.. or whatever.

Less than an hour until work ends, so I'm just going to go home now.
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