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I'm not lost, I just don't know where I'm going.
But I'm determined to enjoy the journey.
Another low content day. 
30th-Jan-2009 01:55
Self greenhair
 

Again, did not go out of the house today. Stayed up far too late last night, and laid awake until five or six in the morning, and consequently slept in for a while. It was darkening by the time I got out of bed. I need to change this.

Accomplishment of the day was finishing the pair of socks I had started knitting before my visit to the US in November. I think that's my third completed pair of socks. No, fourth.. Starting to get the hang of it. I feel like I make new mistakes every time. This pair turned out rather dense, like a cross between socks and slippers.

I should have a knitting icon.

Made a proper dinner today. Delicious in its simplicity. Rice, tuna, Szechuan spicy tomato sauce. Side of iceberg lettuce. I don't have a real dinner every day. I feel ill equipped to take care of myself. Wishing I had taken the education to become a nutritionist or something. At least that would be useful to me in everyday life. But I don't think it's improper nutrition that is the cause of my constant fatigue. It's the lack of sleep.

My life has been a bit bland and repetitive recently. A bit too much entertainment (games, TV shows, anime, books), not enough actual happenings. Then again, I will probably get more than I want when my sister gets married in March.

Oh yes, I had another 'nightmare' again involving the mormon church. They were angry with me for something and were holding some sort of court, but I wasn't even allowed to attend and had to wait outside while they were discussing me. [[Reality: I will not be allowed to attend my sister's actual wedding ceremony, as it will take place in a mormon temple where only members in good standing are allowed entry.]] I got so pissed off, I just stormed in there, pushed aside the woman who was speaking, and loudly proclaimed that I would face my accusers. And it turned out that all their accusations were bullshit. The first one was that I was 'careless with my finances' which I suppose is mormon-speak for 'doesn't pay tithe' hahah. I retorted that they are just upset because I don't give the church any money, and reminded them that I was no longer a member and they have absolutely no right to anything of mine. Plus that church has more money than God and they still bleed their members dry. Wasn't GREED one of the deadly sins? That whole hearing served no other purpose than to harass my mother. I then woke up, which I was a bit disappointed with, as I felt undefeatable. The woman I had pushed aside was in tears. None of them were prepared for anyone questioning their authority.

Lately, almost all of my my dreams have had a clear trigger from reality. If I think about it, I can understand easily why I dreamed just that.
Comments 
30th-Jan-2009 02:36 (UTC)
I actually like the socks that are a hybrid between shoes and socks. Admittedly, I only wear that type in the winter, but still.
30th-Jan-2009 15:09 (UTC)
Oh, I didn't mean that I don't like them. I am quite pleased with how they turned out - but it wasn't what I intended when I started them, which shows I still need more experience with sock knitting.
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